Wednesday, January 09, 2008

My Place

So here's a little tour of my house. Its messy, but this is a typical day at my place.

Front walk, from the driveway. We park one behind the other which is a pain as we have to do a car shuffle at times. That plant in front is a red hibiscus tree. I hate it. It drops dead flowers that look like old tampons on the walkway. The flowers in those containers I planted a year ago and they're somehow still alive. If a plant can't make it outside, it doesn't get much of a chance with me. The walkway desperately needs pressure cleaning.
Front door. I made that wreath. I have several that I change out throughout the year. I want to make one with pansies, my favorite flower, for the summer. My husband hung the light fixture. The old one barely worked as the sensor was bad and you'd be trying to find the key in the lock in the dark and once you opened the door, it turned on. Now the light is on when we turn it on and off otherwise. Being a long narrow townhouse, we don't have but a few windows. That's one of 3.
Front entry hallway. Someday we'll get around to painting. On the left, that's a laundry rack we use after the dryer finishes. That's my clothes that I should have put away days ago. The laundry room is on the left next to it.
Off the hallway to the left, the computer room. My desk on the right. My husband's messy desk on the left. He hasn't even hooked up his computer since we moved back in. See the new wall that separates room from garage? It needs painting. That's one overloaded bookshelf, but we have several boxes of books in the garage, and I gave several boxes away plus sent a box to my parents' house. I love books. See my little fish tank on the desk? It holds 1 betta and some live plants.
Along the wall beside the door is the pet bed. This is Pullo. He's 1.
Off the hallway to the left is first my son's room, but he's home and I decided not to bother with all that mess. Just after, same side, is the guest bathroom. Not too special.
Off to the right is the kitchen. Its an unusual room, architecturally. Note the lack of counter space and cabinets.
Stuff on the floor because there's no cabinets or counter space. That's Xena, eating, as usual.
And that's Toffee.
We have this odd ledge, so we use it to hold wine glasses, roasting pans, things that are rarely used.
The pass through to the dining room.
And my shot glass collection. I get one from every cool new place I go. Once in awhile people will give me one also. If its from somewhere they've been, I keep them. Otherwise, I rotate them out periodically and give them away as the cabinet becomes full. Usually its full, but husband took two for painting his models. I don't know why he used shot glasses, but it doesn't matter.Dining table, mail, lamp for model building. I love my dining set. The seats are microfiber and the wood is cherry walnut.
Living room complete with half hidden cat gym. Pullo still uses it. Couches are again microfiber. I tried to coordinate the color scheme. Messy blanket on the back of the couch is very soft and used nightly for curling up to watch movies.
Back view into the passthrough.
Back patio. Its tiny and we rarely use it. Now that only 1 of our friends smokes, we'll use it even less.
Living entertainment area. Lots of video games and such.
DVDs by the metric ton. And, ahem, my tree that needs to get put away. I crushed it up to be boxed, but haven't put it away yet. The picture on the wall is from our wedding.
Master bedroom. I love our furniture. The comforter is microfiber (yes, its my favorite fabric) with down. We get to use it 2 days a year. Otherwise its just a light cotton blanket.
TV for bedtime watching and the cat tree husband built.
My side of the bed is just as messy, but with different kinds of mess.
Closets for each of us. Mine's the bigger one.Bathroom. No good shot of the giant shower. It fits 5 comfortably.
Toilet alcove so one person can pee and the other can brush their teeth.
Super messy closet that holds all the extra bathroom products and all the medicines.
That's about it.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

How to give/receive good gifts

Give:
Listen to what people are interested in. Not their hobbies that they do all the time, or the collections they already have tons of stuff for, but what sparks their interest.
  • Do you remember hearing they saw some cool piece of art at the mall? Give a membership to the local gallery.
  • Does your friend volunteer or express an interest in giving back to the community? Offer to spend one afternoon volunteering together, your friend picks the place.
  • An avid reader? Gift certificates to your favorite bookstore are perfect. Want to really personalize it? Throw in a bookmark you pick out just for them.
  • A couple who seems to have everything? A certificate to your favorite restaurant. They may find they love it too. We also love to take friends that are new to the neighborhood to a nearby restaurant.
  • Into being the welcome wagon for strangers in the neighborhood? Compile copies of your favorite take out menus and make a little map (hand drawn is fine - or Google Earth if you're fancy) of the nearest grocery store, gas station, etc.
  • Notice something your friends have is getting old or worn? Replace it for them. They'll appreciate the sentiment and that you took the time to notice.
Gift certificates:
People are put off by gift certificates. They feel there has to be an amount worthy of giving. The gift is the thought! Just the thought. Don't feel burdened by keeping up with the proverbial Joneses.

How much would you spend at that store? Buy the certificate in that amount. A book is less than $10 with tax. A dinner is about $50 (depending on the restaurant). A sweater is maybe $20-30. Of course they can spend more, but let them cover the rest if they want more.

I got a certificate from a coworker to Macy's once. I never shopped at Macy's, thinking it over my price range. The certificate was for $25 and I got a great pair of XOXO sunglasses that I had for a few years. I thoroughly enjoyed those shades and never would have had them at all if not for taking me out of my comfort zone to a store they liked.

One of my favorite gifts of all time is tickets to events. I love plays and performing arts. I've gotten tickets to Blue Man Group and all sorts of fun things that I might not have experienced otherwise. My parents are usually good for that kind of thing. They know I have what I need and don't collect clutter.

Receive:
Smile and say thank you. No matter what. You're thanking them for the thought. They took the time to shop for you and spent their money on you. Smile and say thank you. If its awful, regift it. If its not truly awful, repurpose it. Maybe that scarf would be cute as a curtain tie back or a belt.

Gift certificates, revisited:
You've received a gift certificate. Now what? Follow up!
  • If you got a certificate to a restaurant, call them, or drop a quick email, the day after you visited there and say what your favorite thing was. Maybe they have a killer shrimp appetizer that you tried but they've never ordered. Even if everything else about the place is awful and you'll never go back, find one nice thing to say.
  • If you got a certificate for anything else, take a picture of you enjoying whatever you bought with it. Sign the back "Thanks for your thoughtful gift certificate!" You reading a book you bought with the certificate, you in a sweater you bought with the certificate, you in the sunglasses you bought with the certificate, etc.
  • Similarly, if you get a bottle of wine as host for a party or a dinner, write the name of the giver on it and when you open it, drop them a quick message (text is fine) saying "We're enjoying that wine you gave us. Thanks again!"
Best gifts ever:
I'm a great gift giver. I developed my skill in high school and been continuing to hone it ever since. No really, ask my friends! Usually there's one gift a year that stands out as "the one", the most fitting gift of the year. Here are my best given gifts:
  • Light up bocce ball set. Friends of mine invited us over to play drunken bocce ball one night and they didn't have a light outdoors so they kept angling this flood light to see the balls. It was tedious work, I'm sure, and still hard to find your ball in the grass. I came across the light up set in some random catalog and said "they have to have it!" I think it cost me less than $30 and they were delighted by it. We did use it and it was much easier. You know a gift like that comes with comments from other friends "wow, where'd you get this?" and you get the kudos even while you're not there.
  • Time Turner from Harry Potter. My husband's aunt is an ER nurse and often in several directions at once. She's also a big Harry Potter fan. I found one of those catalogs that sells movie replica things and thought she'd get a kick out of it. She loved it.
  • Fish tank with coupon for a fish. My former boss was the high-stress, type A kind. I brought in, and set up, a fish tank on her desk where she could relax looking at it, but still work. I included a gift certificate for $5 to cover the cost of fish. Two years later, I hear she still has the fish.
  • Calendar, pre-filled. My friend is recently divorced and he complained that he'll have to start remembering birthdays and such now that his wife isn't around do it for him. I got him a calendar and wrote in all the birthdays and anniversaries that I could gather from our mutual friends.
Best gift ever:
The best gift I ever received deserves a little spot here, too.

After 5 years of dating, my now husband and I were talking about getting engaged for about a year. He just wasn't ready yet. On Christmas Eve, after the kid had gone to bed and we had a quiet house to ourselves, he sat me down on the couch by the tree and gave me an early present. In the tiny box was a pair of diamond earrings in the past-present-future setting. He said they were a placeholder for the engagement ring that he wasn't ready to give me yet. It was sweet and they were beautiful. They still are, I still have them, of course. The next Valentine's Day, he gave me the matching necklace. As a side note, it was another 3 years before he proposed.

Its my favorite Christmas memory next to my 5 year old son sprinkling "reindeer food" on the lawn (it was birdseed).

How to be a good friend

Once a week, say on Mondays, go through your cell phone book on your drive home and call one person you haven't spoken to in awhile.

Pictures Part 2

Coming soon - no really!

Thursday, April 05, 2007

The Cast

My boys (my son/ringbearer, me, Dave, my best friend E)
Dave's Boys (Dave's bro, me, Dave, Dave's nephew/ringbearer)
My 'Rents
Dave's 'Rents
Group Shot
E's Flowers (as my best man / maid of honor, somebody had to hold my bouquet during the ceremony - please feel free to use as blackmail as long as I get a nice cut)
Rents Dancing (they hadn't danced together EVER before)

Setup & Site Pictures

Centerpiece
Crudite (this was long gone before we arrived to see it)
Cake (mojito and vanilla rum layers)
Ceremony
Bouquet as centerpiece
Wall covering
Room as art
Link to old picture of Warhol room
Table Cards
Takeout Boxes (favors: chopsticks, personalized CD of "donated" songs, custom fortune cookies, green tea incense)

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Ceremony Pictures (take 1)

I've gotten photos back from two guests so here are the ceremony pictures from them. Reception pictures will be in a separate post.

This is the ceremony location at Sundy House. See the floating flowers in the water? I wasn't expecting those!
My mom went up the aisle escorted by our friend , Neal.Dave's parents coming up the aisle.The ceremony took place outdoors. The weather was perfect.Our friend Anjanette gave a Buddhist reading:

In the future, happy occasions will come as surely as the morning.

Difficult times will come as surely as the night.

To say the words love and compassion is easy.

But to accept that love and compassion are built

upon patience and perseverance is not easy.

First kiss.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Long Version of Wedding

Now here's the longer version:

That morning, we woke up, had smoothies, and drove to the spa. We had a couples' massage which I highly recommend to any wedding-day bride. We were completely relaxed and smelled of oils. Then Dave left and I got my hair and makeup done. I had just a rough idea how I wanted my hair and let the hairdresser do as she liked. I told her I wanted it partly up, but enough to cover my tattoo (you can see it in one picture here, but that's fine) and I didn't want to touch it all night and it had to stay put. She said no problem and went to work affixing my tiara and veil (not shown). I forgot my veil at home and had to have my dad (who was at my house) drive it to me. I said, out loud, "if that's the worst thing that happens all day, no biggie." Did I curse myself? for) Perhaps. So my hair was done, veil in place, tiara in place - yes, I went with the tiara instead of hair pins as the hair dresser said the tiara would look more timeless (what I asked herand she'd poof my hair behind it so it would downplay the tiara's size. She also said hairpins look like prom accessories and she didn'tl ike it, so okay. My mom got her hair and makeup done (she hasn't worn makeup in 20 years) and it looked great. My friend Will even said "your mom's a very attractive woman!" I told the makeup artist I wanted to look like a picture I'd brought in. The picture had a bride with a very clean fresh looking face. She had makeup on, but it looked natural and flawless on her, not attention-drawing. I said "I don't want any one feature as the focus, but the whole face as the focus." And she pretty much did that. The pictures you see here are from 10pm, 11 hours after my hair and makeup got done, so forgive my very red eyes (long day of having contacts in) and anything else that being tired did to my look.

After leaving the spa, mom and I went to Taco Bell for some quick take out and back to my place to use the bathroom, get my dress and such, and head out. We ran a few minutes late. Almost home, I realized Dave had my car keys, and thus my house keys. I called his cell (thank the gods for cell phones!) and he was almost to Sundy House. I said I'd call a locksmith and don't worry about it, but tell the photographer and site I was running late. I went to my neighbor's house (veil on, tiara on, hair and makeup done, in jeans) and they felt so bad for me. I used their phone books and called 4 locksmiths. Each promised 30 minutes. Whoever got there first got my business. One arrived in 30 minutes and broke my deadbolt off. I was paying him as the second locksmith arrived. Now I'm 50 minutes behind schedule, mind you, and my nerves are shot. The second locksmith won't take "go away" for an answer and demands I pay him the service call. I refuse as he hasn't provided a service. He is insistant to the point of coming into my home. I remind him he's tresspassing and to get the hell out. I go Bridezilla on him - but he seriously was a major jerk about the whole thing. I tell him to bill me. He has my address, just go away, I don't have time for this, I'm on my way to my wedding. Remember, I'm in a veil!!! So he refuses. I quickly gather my things and bolt out the door, leaving only the bottom knob locked and a whole in the deadbolt, not secure, but what choice do I have? I tell my mom to keep her car moving so the jerk doesn't block her in. He threatens to call the police. I tell him go ahead. After all, I won't be there when they arrive. His supervisor calls my cell phone so many times I turn it off. Ridiculous. I'm completely tense and near tears over that jerk and his aggressive behavior. I pull it together though. I tell my mom that I'm trying to be cool about the whole thing but this seriously sucks. I do realize that nothing can start without me, so I have a little solace in that whole mess. But I do need a new massage after all that.

Mom drives like...well, like I do...to get there, which is well over her comfort level. Mom's one of those people who does just under the speed limit. I don't comment until we've arrived. She says "yeah, that is probably the fastest I've ever driven" which makes me laugh a little. I don't consider 75-80 mph to be that fast.

We get there in great time and everyone's up in the hotel room getting dressed. Why everyone's not already dressed I don't know, but they've been there and hour. I shoo everyone out so I can get dressed. I have 10 minutes to get pictures done before the ceremony. Then the site coordinator says "we have you scheduled to start at 5:00" I say it's for 4:30, but he says they have it differently. I have Eric (my best friend and that day's servant for me - poor Eric, I owe him one!) get with the photographer, Dave, and the officiant. All say 5:00 is fine. Great! So I'm not that late after all. We get the family shots done and most of the posed pictures out of the way. Dave sees me in my dress for the first time and he loves it. He really really loved my hair though. Everyone showed up on time (to my knowledge - at least on time for a 5:00 start) and had pre-ceremony drinks of mojito, red sangria, white sangria, and lemonade. We saw our group congregated in a gazebo while we were taking pictures. It was lots of fun to see them in anticipation and all dressed up. Eric brought me a mojito - he's the best!

The wedding started on time, I think (I didn't have a watch) but they told us to come and we did so it seemed fine. The processional was timed to music which went fine until Dave's part where he went a full stanza early. He said the site coordinator cued him too soon. No one noticed though as no one knew what the timing should have been. I got choked up as we started down the aisle and just after arriving I lost it for a second. I had those deep hiccupping sobs, but just 2-3 of them. Then I pulled it together. Reverend Rodriguez asked if I needed a minute but I didn't. Dave kept asking if I was okay and I kept nodding but I was still close to tears. When it came time for vows, I said to him "I have to speak now?" which was tough, but I did and didn't cry. When he got to be I did a little fake to the side like I was going to make a run for it. Everyone laughed. It wasn't planned, just something spontaneous that hit me. I didn't even think on it or I probably wouldn't have done it. Our friend Anj gave a reading and she was all choked up which we found to be very sweet. The ceremony was great. Really really great. I wish I hadn't cried, but you can't help what you feel.

We had a cocktail hour, which we caught about half of as we were doing more pictures. The hors d'ouervres were fantastic (tempura shrimp, vegetable spring rolls, and bacon wrapped scallops) and I wish I'd gotten to have more than one of anything. We were announced as was the bridal party. The DJ, who also MC'd the evening, Gary, announced Eric as the best man and maid of honor, which cracked me up.

The dinner was exactly as it was in the tasting, very good. The cake was so yummy but they only cut up the bottom layer and gave us the top, so no one got to try the mojito cake, but we'll have people over this week to eat it with us as we're not saving it for our anniversary. The site didn't feed DJ Gary in a timely manner, which we were miffed about, but he said it was fine and they were boxing it up for him. We wanted to make sure our vendors were taken care of but he said it was fine.

We asked Gary to play mostly jazz, blues, R&B, and funk. We gave him only the first dance song, no playlist. He picked excellent tracks and it was just what I wanted. Some people danced, but no one was forced to. During the first dance, Dave and I were just kind of talking and swaying. It was wierd having a crowd and all that attention just on us.

Things that went wrong:
I forgot to take my engagement ring off before the ceremony so I did it as discretely as possible during the reading and switched it to my right hand. I also forgot something borrowed. I just forgot. I had something new: the dress, something old: an anklet, and something blue: a blue topaz (Dave's birthstone) bracelet that Dave gave me for my most recent birthday. I also took the marriage license out of the box of stuff for Dave to bring to the site (mostly favors and table cards, that kind of thing) because I saw all my folders of vendor contracts and said "he won't need that" but the license was set against them to keep it flat. It is on our DVD player in the bedroom. Oops! I didn't realize until the photographer asked for it as the officiant wanted to sign it. I said "it was in the box, so the site has it". The site coordinator said "it wasn't inthat box" and I remembered removing all the contracts. Doh! So technically, we're not married yet as it's the day after and the paperwork is unsigned. Sigh. We'll get it done right away though. Tomorrow. The date will still be the 28th, I asked.

Otherwise, it was so great to be with our closest family and friends. Everyone who was invited came, which is unheard of, even our friends who live in Norway. Our friends are a fantastic group of people and we don't forget how lucky we are to have them. They really made the day spectacular for us. Honestly, even though I had to deal with the jerky locksmith, got locked out of my house, and forgot the marriage license, it was terrific. I could have done without the whole locksmith bit, but that wasn't really wedding-related. The wedding was simply perfect. All the little personal touches we did (origami swans we folded ourselves and attached to river rocks to display on the tables, fresh orchids on the cake, the trivia on the back of the table cards) made it fun for our guests. Everyone had a good time, I think. We did, and that's important. It was really, truly a wonderful event and a shining memory.

Stay tuned for pictures as I get them.

One of my friends took some video footage and she said she's going to dub the wedding video in the style of the hilarious Japanese game show MXC. I'm so excited. I can picture planning an anniversary party with an MXC wedding video screening!

Quick Recap of Wedding

The wedding itself was fan-freaking-tastic! Honestly, everything was wonderful. It was a perfect event. The ceremony was beautiful, the weather was good (if a little chilly later in the evening), it didn't rain, the flowers were great, everybody was on time, the setting was magical, the photographer was professional, the officiant was easy to work with, the DJ played a perfect mix of his own choosing, the bartender was efficient, the food was perfect, everything was just...I can't begin to gush enough. It was the wedding I dreamed of from the time we started planning the wedding. I had a great time and I honestly think everyone who attended did also. I can't wait for some pictures to start coming in. Lots of friends brought cameras so I'm eagerly awaiting some digitals to share with you here. We will have the professional shots back in a month.

That's your very quick recap.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Favors, Table cards, Place cards

This post contains spoilers but since the wedding is tomorrow, I don't think anyone will mind. Yes, the wedding is tomorrow. Am I a wreck? Absolutely! My nerves were like Superman's until about 2 weeks before the wedding then I had nerves of Jello. Every project started failing at the last minute and I felt pressed for time. Dave was worrying about money (because this wedding more than doubled our originally set budget) and things were very intense at the house from all the frayed nerves.

These are the favors. I bought take out boxes from the craft store and decorated them with a strip of vellum paper in a floral pattern from the craft store which wraps around the side and back of the box (you can kind of see it on the right of the box) and a sticker that has our orchid from the invitation (clip art) and a thank you note with the guest's name which I made on the computer and printed on sticker paper. Inside are: a CD that we burned and created a cover sticker for that contains songs dedicated to us by our guests which is in a glassine envelope, a box of incense in Green Tea scent that we liked from a trip we took years ago, a set of chopsticks in a cloth bag for each person, and some fortune cookies custom printed with the message "May the love you have shared with us this day be yours. Dave & Autumn" which I wrote. We did taste test the cookies and they're delicious. We ordered enough extra so every guest will get several in their favor box plus one will be served with each slice of cake. Did I mention the cake will be vanilla rum on one layer and mojito on the other? Can't wait! I think the favors turned out great. As of right now, the name stickers aren't on them because I got my nails done and am literally unable to separate the sticker from the backing so Dave will be sticking them on. For ease of transportation, the take out boxes stack, so they'll need to be assembled at the Sundy House instead of before arrival. Dave or my Dad or Charlie will take care of that.

After many attempts, I also made the table cards from leftover paper from the invitations. I had to cut them down a bit to fit the frames. This is after the first frames were too small and had to be exchanged. The place cards match the table cards although this is the third revision of the design as my printer decided it doesn't like printing certain things. However, it printed these just fine. It's meant to be, whatever it is. They're fine, but not my original thought. Of course no one knows how I "meant" for them to be, so no matter. The tables are named for the 5 elements in feng shui: metal, fire, water, earth, and wood. I picked a color for each element (though not necessarily in keeping with feng shui, but more for the layman to recognize - would you know that black was for water? Probably you'd think blue, so I used blue) and downloaded fonts for each one. Metal was a little tough so I used a variation by using the font that the heavy metal band Iron Maiden uses. It's cute and untraditional. The guests will have a laugh, I hope. I sat some of my heavy metal fans at that table too. The name cards, shown here in front of the framed table cards, have the guests' first names only as it's not so so formal of an event and are written in the matching font and color. It's simple and I think elegant without being overboard. Honestly, looking at this, I think my original idea was overboard. I should keep clean lines and such and this is actually better. Thank you, printer, for crapping out my original idea and working fine on this one. On the back of each card is some trivia. The first 11 questions are about Dave and I and the last 9 are about our guests. I figure it'll give them something to do while waiting for food to be served. It was astruggle to find frames that stood vertically, were the right size for the table cards, and were clear on both sides. These fit the bill and I found a coupon in a bridal magazine for 25% off my order, so that helped. I didn't decorate them as I figure I can use these again at home since they're flat black. That's why I didn't get the silver ones, although they looked quite sharp.

So, what's left? Just putting the stickers on the boxes. The rest is done. Can you believe it? I can hardly believe it. My anxiety level is at about a 9 out of 10. For three days I've had this off and on feeling of having a mouthful of oatmeal in the back of my throat. It's disgusting and makes me want to cough. It's simply a stress reaction, but it's never happened before so it's wierding me out.

Tomorrow's itinerary:
9am wake up (like I'll sleep!), shower, make breakfast smoothies, rinse blender out, feed cats
10am couples' massage at the spa - looking forward to that!
11am hair and makeup
1pm drive through some quick lunch, pick up dress and essentials from home
2pm leave for site
3pm arrive at site, get dressed
330pm pictures
430pm ceremony
500pm reception
930pm bid everyone farewell, rest

Any takers on when those heels will be coming off? I doubt they'll make it until 930.

It's a good feeling to know that everything is taken care of. The caterer is taking care of the food and drinks (although they called me today and said they couldn't find a liquor I requested - which was unacceptable - and I had to go buy it myself). The site is taking care of setup. The florist is taking care of covering the hideous Warhol paintings and setting up centerpieces. Everything we wanted to add has been done. Everything's arrived and is packed up to go in a big box. All the crafting is finished. I excused myself from finishing the guestbook/scrapbook in time and said I have permission to work on it after the wedding. So what if it's not done in time? No need to stress over that. Instead, I made cards, similar to the table cards, and wrote on the front "My favorite part of today was..." and I'd like them to write inside. I think that'll make an awesome keepsake for me. It'll go in the scrapbook when I am ready to get back to it.

Wish me well. Send out thought of "don't throw up!" And at 5pm look at your clock and think that I'm having my first dance as a married woman and send me a little smile.